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  • schroederlilly782

Inside

Aktualisiert: 1. Apr. 2023


Dead insight,

Dark blue, flashing light,

Thoughts back and forth in a constant fight,

Who is to judge of what is right?

The sun will come back but why does it never seem to be as bright?


As bright as it once seemed,

Happiness with u is what I dreamed,

But now the whole is empty and the feeling so dull,

With you a heart was full.


Step after step as if you’re walking through mud,

Like a piece of paper so easy to cut,

Fast and sharp with little pain,

It goes through all my vains,

A rage of anger making my heart rate go up,

Like horses racing but they never stop,

Should I end myself because it’s all that I can think of?

The sound so loud yet unclear,

Everything like a storm until it disappears,

Not one thing that I now fear,

Falling backwards, blindfolded, loud noises, so fast, so slow, so quite, so unclear -

Until all that’s left is a simple tear.


So cold on my warm skin,

From what starts as a stretch of big to becoming thin,

Unfinished noises but you listen to how they begin,

A simple tear as if it isn’t yours,

Why is it so cold and I so warm while at the same time my whole body feels so cold!

You feel the ice-cold tear running down your cheek,

Nothing that you want to keep,

As if your soul is in an unfamiliar house,

U feel everting and nothing and just want to shout,

But nothing comes out,

Like ur head is underwater,

Time might heal but no one tells you it’s getting harder.


Starring at the ceiling,

Having no sense of any feeling,

Dead insight,

Darkness of the night,

When the sun again went down,

Your eyes do receive the setting,

Your body there and full-on sweating,

Your brain feels nothing and all,

While it accepts the decision to fall,

And your body feels like an engine that won’t go back on,

At this moment I don’t want to hang on.


So, it continues and slowly rises – up and away,

Like a dream made with clay,

You form it but it finds it hard to stay,

The heart rate goes down so slowly, so quite so tired,

I don’t even know what I once admired.


My body so heavy and slow,

I lay there and want to go,

I leave that unfamiliar house and look from above,

How did I become this lost?


When slowly it rises and your soul fades

Where do I find faith?




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